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The Onion: Press Secretary Spins Wife\ The Onion: Press Secretary Spins Wife's Death As A Positive
Posted by: TheOnion

Video duration: 140 seconds

White House Press Secretary Ted Barrett deflects questions about the gruesome car wreck that killed his wife, instead focusing on the President's agenda.
More coverage at: http://onion.com

Related: accident, bush, death, george, house, media, onion, press, white

The Onion: Pretend You Give A Shit About The Election The Onion: Pretend You Give A Shit About The Election
Posted by: TheOnion

Video duration: 180 seconds

Our morning show's political correspondent offers tips on how you can seem informed about politics without picking up a single newspaper.

Related: barack, comedy, election, fake, funny, john, mccain, news, obama, politics, satire, voting

The Onion: Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results Of 08 Election The Onion: Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results Of 08 Election
Posted by: TheOnion

Video duration: 164 seconds

Embarrassed Diebold officials apologized after one of their electronic voting machines prematurely revealed the winner of our upcoming sham election.
More coverage at: http://onion.com

Related: 2008, election, machines, onion, the, voting

The Onion: Disney Geneticists Debut New Child Stars The Onion: Disney Geneticists Debut New Child Stars
Posted by: TheOnion

Video duration: 161 seconds

Disney claims its latest batch of child stars is so lifelike, youll barely be able to tell they have no souls.

Related: brothers, comedy, cyrus, disney, funny, hannah, jonas, miley, montana, onion, teens

The Onion: Supreme Court: Death Penalty Is \ The Onion: Supreme Court: Death Penalty Is 'Totally Badass'
Posted by: TheOnion

Video duration: 182 seconds

Despite arguments against capital punishment, the Justices overwhelmingly approved its use, especially if they get to participate in some executions.

Related: badass, capital, comedy, court, death, fake, funny, justice, law, news, penalty, punishment, satire, supreme

Poll: Bullshit Is Most Important Issue For 2008 Voters Poll: Bullshit Is Most Important Issue For 2008 Voters
Posted by: TheOnion

Video duration: 145 seconds

For a majority of likely voters, meaningless bullshit will be the most important factor in deciding who they will vote for in 2008.
More coverage at: http://onion.com

Related: barack, clinton, election, hillary, john, mccain, obama, politics, president, voting

Pre-Game Coin Toss Makes Jaguars Realize Randomness Of Life Pre-Game Coin Toss Makes Jaguars Realize Randomness Of Life
Posted by: TheOnion

Video duration: 161 seconds

After comprehending the capricious nature of fate, the Jaguars could not go through with the charade of playing a meaningless football game.

Related: brady, comedy, football, funny, giants, jacksonville, jaguars, manning, onion, satire, superbowl, tom

Old, Grizzled Third-Party Candidate Threatens McCain\ Old, Grizzled Third-Party Candidate Threatens McCain's Base
Posted by: TheOnion

Video duration: 186 seconds

Experts predict that Joad Cressbeckler could tip the election to Obama by attracting people who want to vote for the most crotchety candidate possible.

Related: 2008, barack, comedy, election, funny, john, mccain, obama, onion, palin, sarah, satire

YouTube Contest Challenges Users To Make A \ YouTube Contest Challenges Users To Make A 'Good' Video
Posted by: TheOnion

Video duration: 152 seconds

YouTube is offering a cash prize to the first user to upload a video with a shred of originality or artistic merit.

Related: comedy, contest, fake, funny, news, onion, satire, youtube

The Onion: Situation In Nigeria Seems Pretty Complex The Onion: Situation In Nigeria Seems Pretty Complex
Posted by: TheOnion

Video duration: 161 seconds

In The Know: Panelists discuss the complicated issues facing Nigeria or Niger.
More coverage at: http://www.onion.com

Related: africa, news, nigeria, onion, the

NASA Simulator Preps Astronauts For Larry King Interview NASA Simulator Preps Astronauts For Larry King Interview
Posted by: TheOnion

Video duration: 212 seconds

NASA instructors offer a firsthand look at the training astronauts endure before they can physically and mentally withstand an appearance on Larry King Live.

Related: astronauts, comedy, fake, funny, king, larry, live, nasa, news, onion, satire

Voting Machines Elect One Of Their Own As President Voting Machines Elect One Of Their Own As President
Posted by: TheOnion

Video duration: 195 seconds

Voting machine DRE700 came out of nowhere to defeat Barack Obama and John McCain and become the first machine president.

Related: barack, comedy, election, fake, florida, funny, john, machine, mccain, news, obama, onion, palin, sarah, satire, voting

Should The Government Stop Dumping Money Into A Giant Hole? Should The Government Stop Dumping Money Into A Giant Hole?
Posted by: TheOnion

Video duration: 125 seconds

With the economy sliding deeper into a recession, panelists discuss whether it's time to stop throwing our money into a massive pit out in the desert.

Related: bailout, business, comedy, fake, funny, money, news, onion, paulson, recession, satire

The Onion: McCain Left On Campaign Bus Overnight The Onion: McCain Left On Campaign Bus Overnight
Posted by: TheOnion

Video duration: 159 seconds

Campaign officials downplayed the incident, saying the senator was fine as soon as he was fed and taken to the bathroom.

Related: barack, comedy, fake, funny, john, mccain, news, obama, onion, palin, sarah, satire

In The Know: Has Halloween Become Overcommercialized? In The Know: Has Halloween Become Overcommercialized?
Posted by: TheOnion

Video duration: 198 seconds

Panelists discuss whether Halloween candy and costumes have distracted us from placating demons to ensure a bountiful harvest.

Related: comedy, fake, funny, halloween, news, onion, satire